Neutropenia!!

No, it's not a mild face cleanser, or an obscure Who album. And up until a few weeks ago, I had no idea what it was or what it meant. But now that I have it, I'm becoming quickly familiar with it.

Basically, neutropenia is when the number of neutrophils (the white blood cells which destroy bacteria) is too low. The chemotherapy is apparently doing a stand-up job of killing actively-growing cells -- and I'm sure that it's getting all the evil cancer cells as well as the happy, innocent neutrophils which never did anything wrong and have no reason to die! Poor little neutrophils.

Anyway, what this means is that I'm at greater risk for infection. But I had the Neulasta shot last week, so it should start kicking in any day now, and my WBC should be back up again by next Tuesday, for treatment #2. I'm meditating on this, imagining my white cells reproducing like crazy (yes, in my imagination, they are white, and they are wearing little white nurses' caps, for some reason). I MUST be well enough for this next treatment!!

The thing is, I felt really good today. Besides the typical morning lightheadedness, I was fine. The news of the low WBC count was really surprising, and it makes me realize I can't always know what's going on inside my body. At this point, I feel like my skin is my armor, protecting my blood from infection, and I am on guard. There's a war going on inside of me. It's just so bizarre to think about.