Barium? bari-yum!
Yesterday was my dad's 65th birthday. How about, I said, for this milestone day, I'll go get a CT scan?
Well, the best gift of all came today when we got the report: no evidence of metastatic disease! HUGE relief. Happy birthday, daddy.
Some CT-related definitions:
BARIUM, n., a chalky, pina-colada-flavored swill of which you are forced to drink not one but TWO effing Nalgene-sized containers. People, getting that stuff done was sheer force of will. I imagine there are many who can't do it. It was awful, nasty stuff. And so MUCH of it. On an empty stomach. Oh, and by the way, it's a laxative too. That made the rest of the afternoon fun.
Do you remember when Curious George swallowed a puzzle piece and had to go to the hospital? Here, he looks much happier than I did drinking the barium. Silly monkey.
INCOMPETENT CT TECHS, n., pl., staff whose job requirements apparently involve having little or no ability to find a vein in which to put an IV. Hint: shaking your head and saying "damn" every time you shove the needle deeper into my arm does NOT help you get it right. Total time to get the IV in: about 10 minutes.
CT SCAN, n., a test for which you lie on a table and pass through the circular opening of large, thin machine. An x-ray rotates around and takes images of you in slices, making you more radioactive than ever. After one pass-through, the CT techs (see above) start the IV contrast dye (which makes you feel warm all over) and they take more x-rays. Total time for the scan: about 10 minutes.
Only one more test to go next week (MRI of right breast), and then no more tests for awhile!
Well, the best gift of all came today when we got the report: no evidence of metastatic disease! HUGE relief. Happy birthday, daddy.
Some CT-related definitions:
BARIUM, n., a chalky, pina-colada-flavored swill of which you are forced to drink not one but TWO effing Nalgene-sized containers. People, getting that stuff done was sheer force of will. I imagine there are many who can't do it. It was awful, nasty stuff. And so MUCH of it. On an empty stomach. Oh, and by the way, it's a laxative too. That made the rest of the afternoon fun.
Do you remember when Curious George swallowed a puzzle piece and had to go to the hospital? Here, he looks much happier than I did drinking the barium. Silly monkey.
INCOMPETENT CT TECHS, n., pl., staff whose job requirements apparently involve having little or no ability to find a vein in which to put an IV. Hint: shaking your head and saying "damn" every time you shove the needle deeper into my arm does NOT help you get it right. Total time to get the IV in: about 10 minutes.
CT SCAN, n., a test for which you lie on a table and pass through the circular opening of large, thin machine. An x-ray rotates around and takes images of you in slices, making you more radioactive than ever. After one pass-through, the CT techs (see above) start the IV contrast dye (which makes you feel warm all over) and they take more x-rays. Total time for the scan: about 10 minutes.
Only one more test to go next week (MRI of right breast), and then no more tests for awhile!
posted by Rachel Troxell at 6:28 PM
1 Comments:
Dear Rachel,
We just caught up with your blog and appreciate your sharing your experiences. We are thrilled to learn that the test on your Father's birthday was negative...best gift you could have ever given him! Those inept nurses and needles are literally a giant pain! We say kick them hard when they hurt you while trying to get your tender vein!
Hugs to you xoxoxo,
Emily & Howard
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