Not alone

Yesterday I went to my first support group meeting for women with metastatic breast cancer. I'd been to another support group, a more generalized pan-cancer group, but being with six other women who have the same diagnosis that I do was amazingly comforting. I got there earlyish, and watched the women come in. They all seemed healthy, and I thought to myself, they probably just have one little bone met. But as we went around the circle and they told their stories, I was proved wrong. All these women have been living a LONG time with major metastases - liver, lungs, bones, abdomen, ovaries, axilla, lymph nodes. They roll with the punches. There were no Pollyannas, and there were no Debbie Downers. These were real women, living well with their disease, getting through each day with dignity. Granted, I was the youngest and the only one wearing a wig. But these women have been through the ringer, and they still continue to fight. It made me feel like I'm not alone in this, and it gave me more hope. I hadn't realized how powerful being surrounded by that could be. It was a revelation. I asked questions about dealing with pain, about when to call the doctor, about sleeping. These seasoned veterans were so warm and caring, and gave me advice and suggestions. It was practical, real, and informative. There were no tears; it was not about drama. It was perfect.